Misadventures in Autocorrect

My sister (!!!) and her kids (!!!) are coming to Florida (!!!!!!!) soon (!!!!!!!!!!!!), and to celebrate, my parents are renting a giant waterslide for their backyard for the kids (and Sean) to enjoy. My mom wanted my help picking one, so she sent me the webpage via text. But Siri was back on her bullshit and put some spaces where they didn’t belong.

The text said something along the lines of, “It’s just bounce online.com. Without the spaces though.” I read it as, “It’s just bounceonline.com,” so that’s what I typed in. It took me to a form asking for my full name, email address and phone number.

Man, these people are intense. I guess they want to make sure you’re really serious about renting a waterslide before letting you see the goods. I shrugged it off, filled out my info, clicked submit…and landed on a page that said, “Thanks for your interest in buying this domain! We’ll be in touch soon with pricing.” I reread my mom’s text, realized it was justbounceonline.com, laughed at my mistake, and moved on with my life (after helping her pick out the badass dolphin slide).

Since then, I have received not one, not two, but THREE emails trying to get me to buy bounceonline.com. They’re asking $2,988, but after I didn’t respond to the first two emails, I received another that said, “Make us an offer.” (I’m not joking.)

I wonder how mad Sean would be if I took this refi closing check and bought me a domain name…

Anyway, it made me start thinking about the different business opportunities I could explore with such a special domain name:

• Sell trampolines

• Rent out trampolines

• Fix trampolines

• Sell trampoline parts

• Sell trampoline insurance

• Stream trampoline fitness classes

They’re pretty much all trampoline things.

Anyway, I don’t think I’m going to buy it. Hopefully I don’t seriously regret letting this incredible opportunity pass me by when I’m 97 and still working at Bealls.